Are we there yet?

Some journeys can be long and arduous and test our patience. The journey of learning continues through most of our lives, and perhaps at times we wonder “Are we there yet?” – “Surely I must have arrived by now after everything I’ve been through”!

But we often don’t realize just how far we have come. Most of us are pretty hard on ourselves. Even if we feel fairly ok about ourselves, there can be that little voice in our head, sometimes barely a whisper, that says “I can’t do that”, “I’m no good”, “this isn’t working”…. you’ve heard it… you know the rest.

Working with a few of my coaching clients recently, I noticed the power of the word, “yet” – adding “yet” to the above sentences allows us to be a little gentler, more understanding and compassionate to ourselves as we are learning to improve. “I can’t do that… yet” creates some space for something to happen and a sense that it is possible in the future.

This is the idea of having a “beginner’s mind”, where we don’t have unattainable expectations of ourselves. So whether you’re learning to drive, or play golf or meditate… be gentle and give yourself a chance to learn.

“Yet” also could allow you to see another perspective – “This isn’t working… and yet if I try this other approach, perhaps it might.”

So if we are on a life long journey of learning how to improve ourselves, we will perhaps never get there, wherever we might believe “there” is. There will always be something that we can improve on.

We can only ever improve how we are, by making choices right here and now in the present moment, so perhaps the question should be… “Are you here, yet?”